Hi there movie fans. It's time for yet another review. I may not have all the wise cracking, side splitting, Chindian famous wit that I have been secreting out for a while now. It's been rather stressful at work and also I am having UPSR blues. Mike is due to sit for his first major exam in a week.
Anyway, we still had time to go to the movies and we decided to take a stab at Pixar's latest animation, UP. Make sure you don't miss the beginning. Get to the cinema early.
UP was not one of our designated movies to watch this holiday season. It looked depressing with an old geezer for a hero and a small bumbling boy (from what we could make out from the trailer). So we decided to give it a slip. Then all the reviews starting pouring in. I started to ask myself....are reviews made of liquid form? I mean, isn't "pouring" reserved for liquid type materials? How the heck does review AND emotions (while we are at it) "pour"???? From where? Into what?
I digress.
The reviews were very impressive and we started thinking maybe we should check it out. So we headed out, my cousin KLY's family and us to Tropicana City Mall. It's the newest mall in our neighbourhood and it is actually a pretty cool mall. It's not too big and there is something for everybody. The GSC cinema was not too crowded and if you are waiting for your food and the stands, they will actually deliver it to you. Pretty cool huh!
Anyway, UP was REALLY an enjoyable movie. It had a very strong story line which was really realistic and makes a lot of sense (as far as cartoons go). A good mixture of friendship, parenthood, courage and of course doing the right thing. As with most Pixar/Disney movies, there was a lot of laughter and good jokes.
It's about the story of an old man who was an introvert but fell in love and married a adventurous girl. Life was normal but they couldn't go to a particular fabled place in South America until his wife died of old age and he was alone. Finally, deciding to take things into his own hands, he managed to get going only to find things are not what it seems in this fabled land in South America.
And starts the adventure with a so-called Wilderness Ranger thingy kid who has no idea how to live in the wilderness. But what an adventure they had. Finally the old man shed his grouch of course and understood that life in itself was an adventure. As with all cartoons, all's well ends well. I strongly recommend this movie as fun for the whole family or just with your loved one.
If you truly want to enjoy this movie, there is one teensy weensy condition though. No matter what, this cannot be broken else all will fall apart. Are you ready? Are you tough enough?
Here you go. You must not....You cannot.....question the logic of having an old geezer blowing thousands of balloons in one night, tying it to his fireplace and then lifting the ENTIRE house to fly all the way to South America....without passport and going through duty free shops!
You must accept this one tiny fact and your life in the cinema with this movie will be bliss! Enjoy.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Malaysia - 52 years on
Any object, situation, person or place would normally progress and move forward after being in existence for 52 years. Look at corporations, towns, cities, people and more prevalent, technology. Technology decided to take a huge exponential leap into the future. We flew our first plan at the turn of the 20th century in 1903 but less than 70 years later, we managed to put a man on the moon! The first computers was the size of a boardroom and today PC can outperform that computer by 1000 times. IBM has already invented a chip that can perform pentaflop calculations, which is 1,000,000 trillion calculations a second. That is so mind boggling that I can't even fathom that there is such a huge number. All in about 50 years!
Where is Malaysia in that 50 years? Caning a woman for drinking beer in public. Calling your neighbours immigrants despite them being longer in the country than you and when your ancestors are immigrants themselves. Judging others by differences from your own religion despite the teaching of that said religion. Murder, corruption, accusing others of corruption, putting the needs of the self before the country are just a few incidences that we have "progressed" to.
So have we moved forward?
Sure, we have one of the most recognizable landmarks in the world. Our economy has grown leaps and we have been able to adapt from agriculture to manufacturing and hi-tech. Our airport has won many awards and we have one of the best low-cost carriers in the world. Our people are generally friendly, more accommodating, more co-operative and relatively smart. Most of our smartest brains are being pinched elsewhere.
However, we still have medieval mentality. PAS and many people in today's Govt still want to run this country like Saudi Arabia or Afghanistan where medieval punishment is practiced and everyone follows the word of the Holy book to the hilt. Because we still have hardcore poor, illiterates and places that are non-accessible to TV and mass media (even then, censored and controlled media), we have very ignorant people in the rural areas who believe in the lies and medieval thinking.
People who for some stupid bigoted reasons believe we are in some kind of religious war. People who believe that all the non-muslims are infidels and deserve to die. People who still abuse, rape and condone these abuses done to their own children and then have the audacity to call others barbarians and infidels. People who totally distort the Islamic principles and create fear into the populace in the name of Islam.
I am not a Muslim but I have yet to encounter a Muslim colleague, friend or the guy that stands in front of me in a queue at McDonald's, wanting to kill me just because I pray differently or have different views. Now don't get me wrong. In these rural areas, we do have ignorant Indian and Chinese people who are just as racist and feel that they need to stick it to the Malays, Chinese and Indians and vice versa. How many times have we heard a parent and maybe even your own parents say to the kids or you when you were little that if you don't behave yourself, the Indian man will come and catch you.
I have relatives who are highly educated and hold positions of great responsibility but who are one of the most racist folks ever. My Indian relatives think that all Malay people are lazy and incompetent and when they are reprimanded for their own incompetence, they blame the Malay conspiracy. My Chinese relatives told their children that they shouldn't marry Indians because you will be unhappy and that these Indians will get drunk and come home and hit their wives. That is so untrue. Sometimes we pour gasoline on them and set them on fire. That's beside the point.
Why only Indians? Chinese folks don't gamble, lose everything and then come and hit their wives and children? How many times have you read in the papers a Chinese man gambles or loses all the money borrowed from Ah Long (money lenders) and then kill the whole family including their own small children?
How many times have we read about a Malay man going out looking for another wife and to stop him from doing so, the wife just ignores the fact when he rapes his own daughter...just to keep him in the house?
We are all guilty. Being from a dual culture I am blessed to see both sides but I am so afraid for my children. I don't want to bring them up in a world where we place so much emphasis on race and then generalizing race to certain characteristics. I don't want our country to be like that but I can't do it alone. We all just need to focus on the right things to do and believe in the 1 culture and 1 race, which is Malaysian.
Gaining independence in 1957 gives us the opportunity to see how other countries have progressed so that we can learn and take the shortcut. That's our advantage but we are not using it, instead we are falling into the same traps and mind sets.
It's not impossible, Malaysian. Despite all our differences, we have been living together for 52 years and some even more. Let's bring up our children differently and make that change.
I'm looking at man in the mirror
I'm hoping that he'll change his ways.....
If you wanna make a world a better place
take a look at yourself and then make that change
Where is Malaysia in that 50 years? Caning a woman for drinking beer in public. Calling your neighbours immigrants despite them being longer in the country than you and when your ancestors are immigrants themselves. Judging others by differences from your own religion despite the teaching of that said religion. Murder, corruption, accusing others of corruption, putting the needs of the self before the country are just a few incidences that we have "progressed" to.
So have we moved forward?
Sure, we have one of the most recognizable landmarks in the world. Our economy has grown leaps and we have been able to adapt from agriculture to manufacturing and hi-tech. Our airport has won many awards and we have one of the best low-cost carriers in the world. Our people are generally friendly, more accommodating, more co-operative and relatively smart. Most of our smartest brains are being pinched elsewhere.
However, we still have medieval mentality. PAS and many people in today's Govt still want to run this country like Saudi Arabia or Afghanistan where medieval punishment is practiced and everyone follows the word of the Holy book to the hilt. Because we still have hardcore poor, illiterates and places that are non-accessible to TV and mass media (even then, censored and controlled media), we have very ignorant people in the rural areas who believe in the lies and medieval thinking.
People who for some stupid bigoted reasons believe we are in some kind of religious war. People who believe that all the non-muslims are infidels and deserve to die. People who still abuse, rape and condone these abuses done to their own children and then have the audacity to call others barbarians and infidels. People who totally distort the Islamic principles and create fear into the populace in the name of Islam.
I am not a Muslim but I have yet to encounter a Muslim colleague, friend or the guy that stands in front of me in a queue at McDonald's, wanting to kill me just because I pray differently or have different views. Now don't get me wrong. In these rural areas, we do have ignorant Indian and Chinese people who are just as racist and feel that they need to stick it to the Malays, Chinese and Indians and vice versa. How many times have we heard a parent and maybe even your own parents say to the kids or you when you were little that if you don't behave yourself, the Indian man will come and catch you.
I have relatives who are highly educated and hold positions of great responsibility but who are one of the most racist folks ever. My Indian relatives think that all Malay people are lazy and incompetent and when they are reprimanded for their own incompetence, they blame the Malay conspiracy. My Chinese relatives told their children that they shouldn't marry Indians because you will be unhappy and that these Indians will get drunk and come home and hit their wives. That is so untrue. Sometimes we pour gasoline on them and set them on fire. That's beside the point.
Why only Indians? Chinese folks don't gamble, lose everything and then come and hit their wives and children? How many times have you read in the papers a Chinese man gambles or loses all the money borrowed from Ah Long (money lenders) and then kill the whole family including their own small children?
How many times have we read about a Malay man going out looking for another wife and to stop him from doing so, the wife just ignores the fact when he rapes his own daughter...just to keep him in the house?
We are all guilty. Being from a dual culture I am blessed to see both sides but I am so afraid for my children. I don't want to bring them up in a world where we place so much emphasis on race and then generalizing race to certain characteristics. I don't want our country to be like that but I can't do it alone. We all just need to focus on the right things to do and believe in the 1 culture and 1 race, which is Malaysian.
Gaining independence in 1957 gives us the opportunity to see how other countries have progressed so that we can learn and take the shortcut. That's our advantage but we are not using it, instead we are falling into the same traps and mind sets.
It's not impossible, Malaysian. Despite all our differences, we have been living together for 52 years and some even more. Let's bring up our children differently and make that change.
I'm looking at man in the mirror
I'm hoping that he'll change his ways.....
If you wanna make a world a better place
take a look at yourself and then make that change
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Chindian giving tips on life
As you read whether books or the Internet, you tend to form some good tips in life which seems rather useful at the time. But as with so many things, most of these things tend to be useless but it's still fun reading. Pls feel free to add some of your own.
1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.
2. Americans are the inventors of the unnecessary. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why on the concept of daylight-saving time.
3. People who feel the need to tell you that they have an excellent sense of humor are telling you that they have no sense of humor.
4. The most valuable function performed by the most government is entertainment. Sex DVDs, blown up models, 10M given here and 500M sued there. Where else can you find this?
5. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
6. A penny saved is worthless.
7. They can hold all the peace talks they want, but there will never be peace in the Middle East. Billions of years from now, when Earth is hurtling toward the Sun and there is nothing left alive on the planet except a few microorganisms, the microorganisms living in the Middle East will be bitter enemies.
8. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip and rumours.
9. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.
10. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 12.
11. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
12. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
13. There apparently exists, somewhere in Hollywood, a computer that generates concepts for television sitcoms. When TV executives need a new concept, they turn on this computer; after sorting through millions of possible plot premises, it spits out, "THREE QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT," and the executives turn this concept into a show. The next time they need an idea, the computer spits out, "SIX QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT." Then the next time, it spits out, "FOUR QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT." And so on. We need to locate this computer and destroy it with power drills.
14. Nobody is normal.
15. At least once per year, some group of scientists will become very
excited and announce that:
- The universe is even bigger than they thought!
- There are even more subatomic particles than they thought!
- Whatever they announced last year about global warming is wrong and its worst than ever...until next year.
16. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them. Ask the protesters. 90% of them are unemployed youths who have nothing better to do.
18. The value of advertising is that it tells you the exact opposite of what the advertiser actually thinks. For example:
- If the advertisement says "This is not your father's car," the advertiser is desperately concerned that this car, like all other models of the same brand, appeals primarily to old farts like your father.
- If Coke and Pepsi spend billions of dollars to convince you that there are significant differences between these two products, both companies realize that Pepsi and Coke are virtually identical.
- If the advertisement strongly suggests that Nike shoes enable athletes to perform amazing feats, Nike wants you to disregard the fact that shoe brand is unrelated to athletic ability.
- If Budweiser runs an elaborate advertising campaign stressing the critical importance of a beer's "born-on" date, Budweiser knows this factor has virtually nothing to do with how good a beer tastes.
19. If there really is a God who created the entire universe with all of its glories, and He decides to deliver a message to humanity, He will not use as His messenger a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle or a person who uses so much hair spray that his hair can deflect small caliber bullets.
20. You should not confuse your career with your life.
21. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
22. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take things too seriously.
23. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.
24. Your friends love you anyway. If they don't, they are not your friends.
25. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
26. Never lick a steak knife. It's bad table manners and no one wants to see your blood!
27. The secret to a successful marriage is to always look older than your wife. If you are somehow blessed with boyish good looks, unless your wife is blessed the same, you are so screwed!
28. To get your wife to stop suspecting you of having an affair with everyone from the vegetable lady to your bosses' secretary, have kids.
29. Whatever TV show you are watching now, will seem like crap 20 years on. Can you remember A-Team, Knight Rider, Airwolf, Six Million Dollar Man?
30. Whatever memories that has inspired you today will one day be stories without any point to your child.
1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.
2. Americans are the inventors of the unnecessary. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why on the concept of daylight-saving time.
3. People who feel the need to tell you that they have an excellent sense of humor are telling you that they have no sense of humor.
4. The most valuable function performed by the most government is entertainment. Sex DVDs, blown up models, 10M given here and 500M sued there. Where else can you find this?
5. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
6. A penny saved is worthless.
7. They can hold all the peace talks they want, but there will never be peace in the Middle East. Billions of years from now, when Earth is hurtling toward the Sun and there is nothing left alive on the planet except a few microorganisms, the microorganisms living in the Middle East will be bitter enemies.
8. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip and rumours.
9. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.
10. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 12.
11. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
12. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
13. There apparently exists, somewhere in Hollywood, a computer that generates concepts for television sitcoms. When TV executives need a new concept, they turn on this computer; after sorting through millions of possible plot premises, it spits out, "THREE QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT," and the executives turn this concept into a show. The next time they need an idea, the computer spits out, "SIX QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT." Then the next time, it spits out, "FOUR QUIRKY BUT ATTRACTIVE YOUNG PEOPLE LIVING IN AN APARTMENT." And so on. We need to locate this computer and destroy it with power drills.
14. Nobody is normal.
15. At least once per year, some group of scientists will become very
excited and announce that:
- The universe is even bigger than they thought!
- There are even more subatomic particles than they thought!
- Whatever they announced last year about global warming is wrong and its worst than ever...until next year.
16. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them. Ask the protesters. 90% of them are unemployed youths who have nothing better to do.
18. The value of advertising is that it tells you the exact opposite of what the advertiser actually thinks. For example:
- If the advertisement says "This is not your father's car," the advertiser is desperately concerned that this car, like all other models of the same brand, appeals primarily to old farts like your father.
- If Coke and Pepsi spend billions of dollars to convince you that there are significant differences between these two products, both companies realize that Pepsi and Coke are virtually identical.
- If the advertisement strongly suggests that Nike shoes enable athletes to perform amazing feats, Nike wants you to disregard the fact that shoe brand is unrelated to athletic ability.
- If Budweiser runs an elaborate advertising campaign stressing the critical importance of a beer's "born-on" date, Budweiser knows this factor has virtually nothing to do with how good a beer tastes.
19. If there really is a God who created the entire universe with all of its glories, and He decides to deliver a message to humanity, He will not use as His messenger a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle or a person who uses so much hair spray that his hair can deflect small caliber bullets.
20. You should not confuse your career with your life.
21. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
22. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take things too seriously.
23. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.
24. Your friends love you anyway. If they don't, they are not your friends.
25. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
26. Never lick a steak knife. It's bad table manners and no one wants to see your blood!
27. The secret to a successful marriage is to always look older than your wife. If you are somehow blessed with boyish good looks, unless your wife is blessed the same, you are so screwed!
28. To get your wife to stop suspecting you of having an affair with everyone from the vegetable lady to your bosses' secretary, have kids.
29. Whatever TV show you are watching now, will seem like crap 20 years on. Can you remember A-Team, Knight Rider, Airwolf, Six Million Dollar Man?
30. Whatever memories that has inspired you today will one day be stories without any point to your child.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Children of the 70s and 80s - Be proud!
To All those Born in the 50's , 60's & early '70s..
First, we survived with mothers who had no maids. They cooked /cleaned while taking care of us at the same time.
They took panadols, candies floss,fizzy drinks, shaved ice with syrups and diabetes were rare.
Salt added to Pepsi or Coke was remedy for sore throat.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
As children, we would ride with our parents on bicycles/ motorcycles for 2 or 3.
Richer ones in cars with no seat belts or air bags and no air-conditions. We had that small fan that cranks when it turns.
Riding in the back of a private taxi was a special treat.
We drank water from the tap, any tap and NOT from a bottle.
We would spend hours on the fields under bright sunlight flying our kites, without worrying about the UV ray which never seem to affect us.
We go to jungle to catch spiders without worries of Aedes mosquitoes.
With mere 5 pebbles (stones) would be a endless game. With a ball (tennis ball best) we boys would ran like crazy for hours.
We catch guppy in drains / canals and when it rain we swam there.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually worry about being unhygienic.
We ate salty, very sweet & oily food, candies,bread and real butter and drank very sweet soft sweet coffee/ tea, ice kacang, but we weren't overweight because.......
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, till streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. AND WE DON'T HAVE HANDPHONE S TO BUG US. And we were O.K. AND WE ARE SAFE.
We would spend hours repairing our old bicycles and wooden scooters out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem .
We did not have Playstations, X-boxes, Nintendo's, multiple channels on cable TV, DVD movies, no surround sound, no phones, no personal computers, no Internet. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and we still continued the stunts.
We never had birthdays parties till we are 21.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and just yelled for them!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
Yet this generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 40 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!
And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the government regulated our lives for our own good.
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
First, we survived with mothers who had no maids. They cooked /cleaned while taking care of us at the same time.
They took panadols, candies floss,fizzy drinks, shaved ice with syrups and diabetes were rare.
Salt added to Pepsi or Coke was remedy for sore throat.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
As children, we would ride with our parents on bicycles/ motorcycles for 2 or 3.
Richer ones in cars with no seat belts or air bags and no air-conditions. We had that small fan that cranks when it turns.
Riding in the back of a private taxi was a special treat.
We drank water from the tap, any tap and NOT from a bottle.
We would spend hours on the fields under bright sunlight flying our kites, without worrying about the UV ray which never seem to affect us.
We go to jungle to catch spiders without worries of Aedes mosquitoes.
With mere 5 pebbles (stones) would be a endless game. With a ball (tennis ball best) we boys would ran like crazy for hours.
We catch guppy in drains / canals and when it rain we swam there.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually worry about being unhygienic.
We ate salty, very sweet & oily food, candies,bread and real butter and drank very sweet soft sweet coffee/ tea, ice kacang, but we weren't overweight because.......
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, till streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. AND WE DON'T HAVE HANDPHONE S TO BUG US. And we were O.K. AND WE ARE SAFE.
We would spend hours repairing our old bicycles and wooden scooters out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem .
We did not have Playstations, X-boxes, Nintendo's, multiple channels on cable TV, DVD movies, no surround sound, no phones, no personal computers, no Internet. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and we still continued the stunts.
We never had birthdays parties till we are 21.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and just yelled for them!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
Yet this generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 40 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!
And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the government regulated our lives for our own good.
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
One-liners!!
Interesting one-liners from our fav cartoon strip Dilbert, courtesy of a very good friend.
1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.
3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..
7. Born free, taxed to death.
8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
11. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
12. I love being a write - what I can't stand is the paperwork.
13. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
14. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
15. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
16. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
17. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
18. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
19. If you can't convince them, confuse them.
20. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
21. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
22. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
23. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
24. Someday is not a day of the week
25. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
26. To err is human; to forgive is not a Company policy.
27. The road to success......Is always under construction.
28. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
29. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.
......and here's the best of the lot
30. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive, fattening or in love with someone else.
1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.
3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..
7. Born free, taxed to death.
8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
11. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
12. I love being a write - what I can't stand is the paperwork.
13. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
14. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
15. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
16. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
17. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
18. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
19. If you can't convince them, confuse them.
20. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
21. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
22. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
23. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
24. Someday is not a day of the week
25. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
26. To err is human; to forgive is not a Company policy.
27. The road to success......Is always under construction.
28. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
29. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.
......and here's the best of the lot
30. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive, fattening or in love with someone else.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Mikey in the STAR newspaper Aug 19 (Education Pg 23)
Pls allow a father to indulge his pride. I know you must be a little nauseated by all this show of publicity over something small but it's a HUGE thing for my kids, especially Mikey. For Kumon to recognize his achievement and hard work, it a great morale boost for him. Also, doesn't he just look precious?
Ignore the pic next to him. Ok...if it's still distracting, look at the smaller cut. HAHAHAHA.
Michael Kumon 19 Aug 09 (Pg 24)
Michael Kumon
Ignore the pic next to him. Ok...if it's still distracting, look at the smaller cut. HAHAHAHA.
Michael Kumon 19 Aug 09 (Pg 24)
Michael Kumon
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Another posting for the Davids - Vanity at its best!
Just to show you a newspaper clipping of our family courtesy of Kumon. This paper's circulation is in Penang and Kota Kinabalu. For goodness sake, don't ask me to translate!!
G.I. Joe - A real guy's movie
This posting is a little outdated. We say GI Joe the weekend it opened and it was the most guy or guy-ness movie you can imagine. I thought Melissa would suffer through it but she actually enjoyed it and more importantly understood it. Though at the end she was a bit confused by the villains. Who was Cobra and what was a Destro?
I was fortunate that I did remember GI Joe from my tween years when it was a cartoon on TV. However, true to guy fashion my son and all 3 nephews had no problems whatsoever relating to the guy-ness that was on full display throughout the movie. The story was not too bad but the acting (apart from Marlon Wayans) had the same effect as a plywood.
Pretty boy (whatever his name was) who played the lead role "Duke" was nothing like the cartoon character (which was closer to Arnold or Van Damme) and he gave the impression of a real pussy! We are so short of action movie heroes. Where is Arnold, Bruce Willis, Sly, Jean Claude Van Damme, Sean Connery, Harrison Ford, Pierce Brosnan of the 21st Century?
Instead we churn out wussies like Freddie Pince Jr, Channing Tatum, Shia LeBeouf and names you can't blinking pronounce!!! Come on!! These guys look either too sleepy to fight the bad guys or too stoned or just too busy ensuring their manicure and face foundation are not disturbed.
Anyway, apart from what I thought was a hero disappointment, the hi-tech gadget and weaponry was veyr creative and totally appealed to the guy sense of destruction and mayhem. It's just sad that there weren't too much blood and gore and flying body parts like Blade or 300. It's another summer blockbuster in the making, just like Transformers 2. You leave your brains behind and just watch ass being kicked! I totally enjoyed it (seeing that I hardly take my brains anywhere).
Ladies, if you really want that Ferragamo bag or Gucci shoes or Longines watch from your other half, this is the movie to take him to. You will want to tear your hair out but the brownie points earned will be worth it. Just ask Melissa.
I was fortunate that I did remember GI Joe from my tween years when it was a cartoon on TV. However, true to guy fashion my son and all 3 nephews had no problems whatsoever relating to the guy-ness that was on full display throughout the movie. The story was not too bad but the acting (apart from Marlon Wayans) had the same effect as a plywood.
Pretty boy (whatever his name was) who played the lead role "Duke" was nothing like the cartoon character (which was closer to Arnold or Van Damme) and he gave the impression of a real pussy! We are so short of action movie heroes. Where is Arnold, Bruce Willis, Sly, Jean Claude Van Damme, Sean Connery, Harrison Ford, Pierce Brosnan of the 21st Century?
Instead we churn out wussies like Freddie Pince Jr, Channing Tatum, Shia LeBeouf and names you can't blinking pronounce!!! Come on!! These guys look either too sleepy to fight the bad guys or too stoned or just too busy ensuring their manicure and face foundation are not disturbed.
Anyway, apart from what I thought was a hero disappointment, the hi-tech gadget and weaponry was veyr creative and totally appealed to the guy sense of destruction and mayhem. It's just sad that there weren't too much blood and gore and flying body parts like Blade or 300. It's another summer blockbuster in the making, just like Transformers 2. You leave your brains behind and just watch ass being kicked! I totally enjoyed it (seeing that I hardly take my brains anywhere).
Ladies, if you really want that Ferragamo bag or Gucci shoes or Longines watch from your other half, this is the movie to take him to. You will want to tear your hair out but the brownie points earned will be worth it. Just ask Melissa.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Men's rules and standard - let's see you try this
I wrote extensively about how us guys are always fumbling about when it comes to social graces and why we are made out to be barbarian by women magazine's like Cosmo. That's because women wrote the rules and standards. The rules are way too incompatible with the guy DNA. That is why we fumble. So this Chindian is starting a guy liberation movement by telling you about the guys' rules and standards. Let's see you try this for a few decades!
These are our rules! They are not mine per se since I got this from a very good GAL friend.
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
1. Guys are NOT mind readers. We never have and we never will be.
( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE )
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Weekend sports; It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just tell us what you want!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials...because we don't disturb you while you are watching your soaps and serials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. Furthermore we have GPS now.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We all do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will ! act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. !
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Racing or Football.
1. 1 You have enough clothes.
1. 2 You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape! Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that ? It's like camping..
So there you go. We will commit to follow women's rules and standards if you try to live by ours. Any takers?
These are our rules! They are not mine per se since I got this from a very good GAL friend.
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
1. Guys are NOT mind readers. We never have and we never will be.
( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE )
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Weekend sports; It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just tell us what you want!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials...because we don't disturb you while you are watching your soaps and serials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. Furthermore we have GPS now.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We all do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will ! act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. !
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Racing or Football.
1. 1 You have enough clothes.
1. 2 You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape! Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that ? It's like camping..
So there you go. We will commit to follow women's rules and standards if you try to live by ours. Any takers?
M&M in the first newspaper appearance!
The David kids, Mikey and Mandy making their first newspaper appearance. Not bad eh? Can someone translate for me?
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Harry Potter vs Manny and Co
It was another weekend of movie binging. It was animation against the very powerful "magic" of Harry Potter. Our new cinema of choice is that of Tropicana City Mall at SS2. It is convenient, new, ample parking space and more importantly; its 3 minutes from home. There are new restaurants opening at the mall too. Furthermore, we discovered that if you ordered something that was not ready at the time, they will bring it to your seat in the cinema! Pretty cool huh!
So on with the show.
Harry Potter
I should remind you that I am a HUGE HP fan. The moment I read the books, I was hooked. However, The Half Blood Prince, I thought was the most boring of the 7 books. So I didn't have high expectations going into the movie. Actually I think they adapted the book rather poorly even in the earlier films. While I thought the casting wasn't too bad, the script for the movie was poor. It's like they want to tell too many stories and so end up telling a bit of everything without any coherrence. It also makes the movies rather shallow.
So this sequel was one of the poorest. It did have its moments like when Ron was in the spell of the Love Potion or when Harry was under the influence of the Felix Felicis (that's a Good Luck potion for those of you who are devoid of life and imagination). I was postitively tickled by that. Other than that, it wasn't the best way for me to spend 2 1/2 hours.
Ice Age 3
The logic of it is not sound but its animation right?? It's already illogical for a mammoth, sloth and sabre tooth tiger to be friends, let alone meeting a mammoth who thought she was a possum! I won't give too much away so you will have to see it for yourself and see you it, you should. This is a show you shouldn't miss. It was hilarious and it managed to keep us very entertained for a 3rd sequel (unlike Shrek. Remember him?).
There was a new character, a weasel which had a British accent but was truy remarkably entertaining. The voice talents didn't disappoint, it was very good wholesome fun for the family and you shouldn't watch it in 3D. Nothing worth 3D-ing at.
So whether you are on for some magic or travel back in time to see talking animals drive the Ice Age crazy, you have some good choices for you. Next stop....GI JOE!!!
So on with the show.
Harry Potter
I should remind you that I am a HUGE HP fan. The moment I read the books, I was hooked. However, The Half Blood Prince, I thought was the most boring of the 7 books. So I didn't have high expectations going into the movie. Actually I think they adapted the book rather poorly even in the earlier films. While I thought the casting wasn't too bad, the script for the movie was poor. It's like they want to tell too many stories and so end up telling a bit of everything without any coherrence. It also makes the movies rather shallow.
So this sequel was one of the poorest. It did have its moments like when Ron was in the spell of the Love Potion or when Harry was under the influence of the Felix Felicis (that's a Good Luck potion for those of you who are devoid of life and imagination). I was postitively tickled by that. Other than that, it wasn't the best way for me to spend 2 1/2 hours.
Ice Age 3
The logic of it is not sound but its animation right?? It's already illogical for a mammoth, sloth and sabre tooth tiger to be friends, let alone meeting a mammoth who thought she was a possum! I won't give too much away so you will have to see it for yourself and see you it, you should. This is a show you shouldn't miss. It was hilarious and it managed to keep us very entertained for a 3rd sequel (unlike Shrek. Remember him?).
There was a new character, a weasel which had a British accent but was truy remarkably entertaining. The voice talents didn't disappoint, it was very good wholesome fun for the family and you shouldn't watch it in 3D. Nothing worth 3D-ing at.
So whether you are on for some magic or travel back in time to see talking animals drive the Ice Age crazy, you have some good choices for you. Next stop....GI JOE!!!
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Lesson learnt
Some teachings and observations in life!
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
The Baby day draws near...Omigawd!!!
I talked a lot about naming your baby well so pls pay heed else you may end up with a homicidal serial killer on your hands! If you are still unsure, then you can use the methods that Native Americans use. Like "Dances with Wolves" or "Stands with a Fist" or "Shits while Standing". This method is simeple and easy to apply. There are 2 ways that you can use. First, when your baby is born, look around for the first thing that inspires you and second, is to give your baby some weeks and see what inspiring event happens that shapes your babies first actions.
So in the first method, you could look around and see your wife feeding your baby for the first time and name your baby "Woman Bares Tits" or "white Milking Tits". Other events could be like "Cuts Wrong Cord" or "Waterful Placenta", you get the general idea.
For method 2, some samples are "Screams at 2 hours" or "Baby Pukes on you" or "Drools like always". You can wait a year and get names like "Walks into walls" or "Kicks your Groin". So you are not confined by some name like John or Mary or Jill or Chastity; you know, stuff like that.
Now you are ready to get the baby stuff. Yep gone are the days where its just buying some napkins, some baby clothes and a basket. I mean how much clothes do they need? Are they going to a ball, the office, an important client meeting, to the football for a game? All they know is to lie down, cry, drool, cry, sleep, drool, eat, sleep, cry, drool and...oh wait....sleep. But new parents don't think that because they think their newborn is having the same life and thought process they have.
"What will people think if I dress my baby is this outfit? What will the other babies think?". Here's the answer, "Where is that tit?". They aren't into fashion but you new parents are going to some store like "Toys R' So Overprice You Have To Commit Felony To Afford Our Stuff and you will buy WHATEVER the store person tells you. You have no choice because the ads and baby industry will make Genghis Khan seem like Maria in Sound of Music compared to you, if you don't get the bottle-warmer, the diaper that absorbs more water than a hippo or the sterilizer or the steamer or liquid detergent that was developed in a secluded mountain in Switzerland so that you baby's skin will glow like those of angels.
Well, if we survived without it, our kids don't really need it. But I am was no better. I had spent so much that I believe was equivalent to the GDP of a small Latin American country. I can't confirm it without my auditors but it would be close. The object is to spend so much that your bank account is committing suicide. That way, you will feel justified that you have bought everything needed. If you have to take out a 2nd mortgage on your house, you have gone too far. That's for the 2nd child and only if you have twins.
So for now, enjoy your false alarms of labour. Your wife constantly going to the loo and you having to constantly remind her that she is gorgeous even when she has a durian doughnut stuffed in her mouth. Welcome pal, you are a husband!
So in the first method, you could look around and see your wife feeding your baby for the first time and name your baby "Woman Bares Tits" or "white Milking Tits". Other events could be like "Cuts Wrong Cord" or "Waterful Placenta", you get the general idea.
For method 2, some samples are "Screams at 2 hours" or "Baby Pukes on you" or "Drools like always". You can wait a year and get names like "Walks into walls" or "Kicks your Groin". So you are not confined by some name like John or Mary or Jill or Chastity; you know, stuff like that.
Now you are ready to get the baby stuff. Yep gone are the days where its just buying some napkins, some baby clothes and a basket. I mean how much clothes do they need? Are they going to a ball, the office, an important client meeting, to the football for a game? All they know is to lie down, cry, drool, cry, sleep, drool, eat, sleep, cry, drool and...oh wait....sleep. But new parents don't think that because they think their newborn is having the same life and thought process they have.
"What will people think if I dress my baby is this outfit? What will the other babies think?". Here's the answer, "Where is that tit?". They aren't into fashion but you new parents are going to some store like "Toys R' So Overprice You Have To Commit Felony To Afford Our Stuff and you will buy WHATEVER the store person tells you. You have no choice because the ads and baby industry will make Genghis Khan seem like Maria in Sound of Music compared to you, if you don't get the bottle-warmer, the diaper that absorbs more water than a hippo or the sterilizer or the steamer or liquid detergent that was developed in a secluded mountain in Switzerland so that you baby's skin will glow like those of angels.
Well, if we survived without it, our kids don't really need it. But I am was no better. I had spent so much that I believe was equivalent to the GDP of a small Latin American country. I can't confirm it without my auditors but it would be close. The object is to spend so much that your bank account is committing suicide. That way, you will feel justified that you have bought everything needed. If you have to take out a 2nd mortgage on your house, you have gone too far. That's for the 2nd child and only if you have twins.
So for now, enjoy your false alarms of labour. Your wife constantly going to the loo and you having to constantly remind her that she is gorgeous even when she has a durian doughnut stuffed in her mouth. Welcome pal, you are a husband!
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