I have experienced the lowest point in my life about 6 months ago and it's a new experience for me. You see, I have never felt unpopular, insecure or really sad at what others thought of me. In fact I welcome feedback and look towards improving if the criticisms or feedback were constructive or if it doesn't affect my conscience. So I am always very positive, sure of myself, confidence, cheerful and upbeat. All that changed 6 months ago when I had to leave my company due to me defending my principles and defending someone but was not defended in return because of their own interests. Also there were a couple of diseased rhinoceros waste that affected these changes. But enough of Satan's minions.
Being someone that played by the book and someone who lived by my ethics, I really thought getting a job was going to be easy. I was relatively well known and popular but nothing could be further from the truth. I went to one interview after another only to be shot down because I was too senior or too expensive. The job market was terrible! Little by little my confidence was eroded and was battered. While money wasn't the major issue, it was definitely a major factor. I had a son going off to college soon and of course the bills to be paid. I couldn't imagine how a breadwinner being the top of his game all his career is now facing the ignominy of not being to pay my bills, selling assets or resort to borrowing money. It was something that I worked very hard not to come to.
So instead of wallowing in self pity, I took stock of what had happened and what I needed to do. First thing was to climb off my high horse and get more humble. Years of my success had made me to some extend arrogant. It made me ignorant of the situation around me and made me focus too little on the human factor. So what if I have to sell some stuff? Is that so important?
Next I took stock of my friends. There were those who were there constantly, looking for jobs for me, helping me with odd jobs and just being there encouraging me and keeping me sane. They told me that as long as I needed, meals will be on them. I love these guys. There were those who kept quiet but waiting to see what happens next. They kept a distance in case I succeeded. Then there were those who disappeared and those who kicked me when I was down. What I did was to look at those who were there for me and take stock of myself as to what I did to deserve the kicking I got. Forgive your enemies but remember their names. Haha but I realized that there are areas I gotta change.
Then finally the most important 2 areas. My family and prayer. My family never wavered. Not for one bit. Even my spoiled kids. Yea I spoil them, sue me. They offered to give up luxuries and both of them even offered to go to a lower cost college or the dreaded Form 6! My wife was a constant rock and not once did she nag or got upset. She carried on as usual and worked harder is keeping our finances manageable. My mom was a surprise. I never had to ask anything from her before but like a mother, she knew when her baby needed her. She stepped up too and she was awesome. My cousin KLY and Caryn were just amazing. They didn't need to but they did and so did one of my sis-in-law and my brother. The little things and gestures they did kept us going and upbeat. I see them in a very new light.
Then prayers. Yea shamefully, I got more prayerful when the chips were down. But I got more prayerful. They say you are closest to God when you are at your worse. I now vow to always be close especially during my high times. God didn't let me down. I now think I know why I was given this test. It was tough and it was unbearable at times but I found myself, my family, my true friends and my God. I also realized a lot about myself and I know what I need to do more. So whenever the chips are down, always realize that there are those much worse than us and as long as you stay true to your principles and your spirituality, He won't let you down.
I hope I will be blessed to be there for you when your chips are down as how others were for me. I also hope that my sharing gives you the strength and sanity when the life tries to keep you down. God bless.
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