Once in a while you come across some thoughts that put you in a mental dilemma. It's a dilemma because it makes you want to exhibit multiple reactions like:-
1) Wow! This is so cool!
2) Who the heck has so much time to actually find this out?
3) And who funded this?
4) I want to laugh out loud but will people think I am stupid?
Well what I am about to share with you, came from my sis-in-law who is a very intelligent, logical (very unique for a woman), deeply caring person but whom I though was devoid of much sense of humour....until this mail. It has been floating around the internet and I am sure if you sure the net as much as I do, you may recognize it.
But being a typcial Chindian and non-sombre Catholic, my reaction is always to laugh and share first. And if you don't like what I shared, then I sincerely say, "TOO BAD!!"
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.)
If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it !)
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(If you burst an artery, make sure there's a fire nearby....why waste?)
A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig..)
A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (That's why we squish it and not pick it up and take out its head!!! but I'm still not over the pig.)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the....?!)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes.. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)
The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm....Maybe that's what the pig uses)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Not true! My brother jumps!!! Damn high too!)
A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
( I know some people like that..)
Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)
Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig?? 30 mins and its not for fun? Also how do you know?)
(and God love that pig!)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Are you a Malay traitor?:
I read this article on one of my most visited news sites, Malaysian Insider and I thought it was really entertaining. Enjoy!
How to tell if you are Malay traitor?
How to tell if you are Malay traitor?
Thursday, March 26, 2009
What kind of party to throw for buckets of testosterone?
It was a question that I grappled with for weeks as my son's 12 year old birthday approached. You can't really take him to those kid's outlet like Mega Kidz at Mid Valley. The last 3 years, Mikey's parties have been at the futsal courts. So what do you do for this clueless and confused buckets of testosterone? We didn't want to encourage teenage type of parties....what to do, what to do???
A new dilemma hit me when I saw Mikey's invite list. It was all boys?!?! I wasn't sure how to react and this is where the sexist attitude comes into play. On one hand, I am glad he is not growing up tooo fast and tooo much. So maybe its good he isn't noticing girls that way. But then, he is a boy and I would want him to be brave and have the courage to talk to girls and have girls as his friends.
But this invite list solved one problem for me, which is I can concentrate on something for the boys.....and that is what I did. I threw an XBox party!!
We only had 2 controllers so my sis-in-laws, cousin and cousin-in-law jumped in and bought 2 more as his birthday presents. That I thought was very cool since I thought the controllers at RM180 a piece, was expensive! Thank goodness for family power as daddy working at IBM sure can't afford it.
The party though was a success, judging by the ALL 26 boys' request to come back after his birthday!! We had XBox with 4 players taking turns (very quick turns mind you), a foosball table, an air-hockey table from my cousin KLY and a carrom board. This is not including the PSPs, Nintendo DSs and Gameboys that were present.
There was food too but I don't think the boys really paid any attention to it. I could have fed them tree barks with relatively clean rain water and they wouldn't have noticed.
Here they are crowded around the XBox. A live T-Rex could have come in and carried one of them off and they still wouldn't notice.
That's the air hockey table.
The mildly interesting carrom board. Not enough to attract the attention of those behind.
The Foosball game where my 8-year old daughter kicked some of these wads-of-testosterone's butt! She is Mandy, Chindian Warrior Cross-me-and-I-will-Kick-Your-Sorry-Butt Demure Princess!
Couldn't stand it anymore with these really dim light bulbs killing Halo's Master Chief!!! Now this is the REAL Master!
All that playing finally breaking Mikey's fragile disposition.
The part where every 12-year old dreads....singing of the birthday song! At least I didn't dance in front of his friends!
All in a day's work! Thanks everyone!!
A new dilemma hit me when I saw Mikey's invite list. It was all boys?!?! I wasn't sure how to react and this is where the sexist attitude comes into play. On one hand, I am glad he is not growing up tooo fast and tooo much. So maybe its good he isn't noticing girls that way. But then, he is a boy and I would want him to be brave and have the courage to talk to girls and have girls as his friends.
But this invite list solved one problem for me, which is I can concentrate on something for the boys.....and that is what I did. I threw an XBox party!!
We only had 2 controllers so my sis-in-laws, cousin and cousin-in-law jumped in and bought 2 more as his birthday presents. That I thought was very cool since I thought the controllers at RM180 a piece, was expensive! Thank goodness for family power as daddy working at IBM sure can't afford it.
The party though was a success, judging by the ALL 26 boys' request to come back after his birthday!! We had XBox with 4 players taking turns (very quick turns mind you), a foosball table, an air-hockey table from my cousin KLY and a carrom board. This is not including the PSPs, Nintendo DSs and Gameboys that were present.
There was food too but I don't think the boys really paid any attention to it. I could have fed them tree barks with relatively clean rain water and they wouldn't have noticed.
Here they are crowded around the XBox. A live T-Rex could have come in and carried one of them off and they still wouldn't notice.
That's the air hockey table.
The mildly interesting carrom board. Not enough to attract the attention of those behind.
The Foosball game where my 8-year old daughter kicked some of these wads-of-testosterone's butt! She is Mandy, Chindian Warrior Cross-me-and-I-will-Kick-Your-Sorry-Butt Demure Princess!
Couldn't stand it anymore with these really dim light bulbs killing Halo's Master Chief!!! Now this is the REAL Master!
All that playing finally breaking Mikey's fragile disposition.
The part where every 12-year old dreads....singing of the birthday song! At least I didn't dance in front of his friends!
All in a day's work! Thanks everyone!!
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Valentines is a time to be suckered! Call me a sucker!
I was always of the opinion that Valentine's Day was really conjured up by some marketing geniuses to create a boost for the retail and F&B industries. The famous St Valentine's Day massacre in Chicago in 1929 between two rival gangs (Al Capone and Bugs Moran), I thought was very aptly named and should be remembered always since consumers are constantly being massacred by the retailers on Feb 14. Some may say that Valentine's is a day to show your love to your loved one. Isn't that supposed to be every day?
So I can ignore my loved one every day but on Valentine's...BAAMMM! I buy her flowers, gifts and a meal that cost more than some African country's GDP, to make up for being a jerk all year long! Anyway, Melissa and I have made a pact that Valentine's was not a compulsory celebration for us. While I still send the occasional flowers to her office and sometimes get her simple gifts if I happen to see something unique, we hardly do anything for Valentine's dinner.
The other difficulties are:-
1) Our kids.....not very on to take them with you and a babysitter is not always available. They are getting older now, so this excuse is getting thin.
2) Not all Valentine's are on weekends
3) Restaurants are always full!!
So this year, my cousin KLY and I thought we will surprise our wives a bit and take them to dinner. We thought that with the economic downturn, we would see better offers that are less inflated and more service provided into the offering and if you had the same thought as I, then perhaps you are very simple minded!
We called about 10-11 places and they were all booked solid. Of course the fact that we decided on the night before Valentine's didn't really help la. We called places like Luna Bar whose set at RM700 per couple were still booked solid. Places like 3rd Floor at Marriott didn't even want to tell us the price. I guess if we had to ask, we couldn't afford it. Economic slowdown, my Chindian fanny!
So at 5pm, both of us were communicating via IM (thank God for technology) while frantically calling restaurants. We even got my cousin, Sow Yee (KLY's sister)into the exercise and finally settled on this new place called Courtyard Gardens at Jalan Dungun.
When KLY called for reservations and asked what was the Valentine's set, the person on the line said the set consists of appetizer, soup, entree, main and dessert! Erm...technically that wasn't a wrong answer but we must first class court jesters and the village idiot combined not to know that!! So we were kinda concerned about this place and the intelligence of the service staff. It's like the lights are on but not everyone's home!
Needless to say, we were very pleasantly surprised. Of course our wives didn't know the tension or the last minute scrambling that went into the process....until now....dang!
Food was not great but was definitely very enjoyable. The ambiance was really, really nice as all converted bungalows are. Unfortunately I had a very old, cheap Sony Cybershot which didn't take night pics very well and hence couldn't take very good pictures.
Here are some shots of our menu. I did take some shots of the restaurant, but it didn't come out well so you have to take our word for it.
Our table was decorated with 2 peacocks!
This is the appetizer. I seem to remember it was something to do with Salmon. The sauce was a little sweet and the Salmon was very fresh.
The entree was Wagyu Beef which was very soft and cooked to a very delectable medium rare (or so is my opinion la).
Our sorbet was served on a very unique and what I thought to be very creative holder. If you look closely, the sorbet glass is sitting on a block of ice but what I enjoyed was that the ice has flowers, reeds, leaves and seeds of different colours frozen in it.
Our main dish was cod-fish with some buttery sauce that was not too filling or creamy served on top of what I could only describe as a very large wantan like substance. The middle's filling is very well marinated and prepared but the wrappings is thick and totally tasteless.
Our dessert was creme brulee slowly heated over a blue flame. It's not very clear but that contraption was to heat the syrup. While it wasn't necessary but it sure made a good show.
We men did get some brownie points for our efforts and while it wasn't much compared to when we were dating or compared to when we had more time and knew more places to hang out, it was very commendable for our standards. So while Chindians are typically still Valentine's Day sceptics and humbugs, I hope you had a good lovers' day celebration on Valentine's Day this year.
So I can ignore my loved one every day but on Valentine's...BAAMMM! I buy her flowers, gifts and a meal that cost more than some African country's GDP, to make up for being a jerk all year long! Anyway, Melissa and I have made a pact that Valentine's was not a compulsory celebration for us. While I still send the occasional flowers to her office and sometimes get her simple gifts if I happen to see something unique, we hardly do anything for Valentine's dinner.
The other difficulties are:-
1) Our kids.....not very on to take them with you and a babysitter is not always available. They are getting older now, so this excuse is getting thin.
2) Not all Valentine's are on weekends
3) Restaurants are always full!!
So this year, my cousin KLY and I thought we will surprise our wives a bit and take them to dinner. We thought that with the economic downturn, we would see better offers that are less inflated and more service provided into the offering and if you had the same thought as I, then perhaps you are very simple minded!
We called about 10-11 places and they were all booked solid. Of course the fact that we decided on the night before Valentine's didn't really help la. We called places like Luna Bar whose set at RM700 per couple were still booked solid. Places like 3rd Floor at Marriott didn't even want to tell us the price. I guess if we had to ask, we couldn't afford it. Economic slowdown, my Chindian fanny!
So at 5pm, both of us were communicating via IM (thank God for technology) while frantically calling restaurants. We even got my cousin, Sow Yee (KLY's sister)into the exercise and finally settled on this new place called Courtyard Gardens at Jalan Dungun.
When KLY called for reservations and asked what was the Valentine's set, the person on the line said the set consists of appetizer, soup, entree, main and dessert! Erm...technically that wasn't a wrong answer but we must first class court jesters and the village idiot combined not to know that!! So we were kinda concerned about this place and the intelligence of the service staff. It's like the lights are on but not everyone's home!
Needless to say, we were very pleasantly surprised. Of course our wives didn't know the tension or the last minute scrambling that went into the process....until now....dang!
Food was not great but was definitely very enjoyable. The ambiance was really, really nice as all converted bungalows are. Unfortunately I had a very old, cheap Sony Cybershot which didn't take night pics very well and hence couldn't take very good pictures.
Here are some shots of our menu. I did take some shots of the restaurant, but it didn't come out well so you have to take our word for it.
Our table was decorated with 2 peacocks!
This is the appetizer. I seem to remember it was something to do with Salmon. The sauce was a little sweet and the Salmon was very fresh.
The entree was Wagyu Beef which was very soft and cooked to a very delectable medium rare (or so is my opinion la).
Our sorbet was served on a very unique and what I thought to be very creative holder. If you look closely, the sorbet glass is sitting on a block of ice but what I enjoyed was that the ice has flowers, reeds, leaves and seeds of different colours frozen in it.
Our main dish was cod-fish with some buttery sauce that was not too filling or creamy served on top of what I could only describe as a very large wantan like substance. The middle's filling is very well marinated and prepared but the wrappings is thick and totally tasteless.
Our dessert was creme brulee slowly heated over a blue flame. It's not very clear but that contraption was to heat the syrup. While it wasn't necessary but it sure made a good show.
We men did get some brownie points for our efforts and while it wasn't much compared to when we were dating or compared to when we had more time and knew more places to hang out, it was very commendable for our standards. So while Chindians are typically still Valentine's Day sceptics and humbugs, I hope you had a good lovers' day celebration on Valentine's Day this year.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Why are Women Magazines trying so hard?
AS you may notice, there is a huge industry out there that is recession proof and that is the tabloids industry (if there is such a thing). The tabloids and women magazine are on a recession proof surge to build up articles on 2 major topics;
1) Why are men so (pick your choice) inept, inconsiderate, insensitive, unromantic, cannot committ, blah, blah, blah.
2) How to get men (pick your choice) in the mood, sexy, good in bed, interested, blah, blah, blah.
I can't really comment on part 1 since men are all that because women made the rules. Why are men to inept in bed? It's because women complain that we climax faster than them.
Is it our fault that happens? We can't help it that we get excited a lot earlier. Sometimes before the women are ready. Sometimes before she is even, technically in the room. But is it something we "chose" to do??? Of course not! It's just our biological make up. Eons ago when the mortality rate was super low due to disaeses, wild beast and a coffee outlet was just a dream, Neanderthals didn't have time to indulge in this huge thing with women called "foreplay". We had to procreate fast and move on. It was the survival of the species. But because of rules set by women, we are suddenly inept.
How come we men don't get to complain about women being SO sensitive, SO spoilt that we have open doors for them, SO picky, SO long to climax, uses SO much tissue, buys SO much of those animal shaped cute soaps that no one can use and only reserved for when the Pope visits???
Anyway, I digress.
I would like to comment on the second point. There are WAY too many covert secrets and methods to get men interested in a love life or a serious commitment or even sex. Especially sex. The way these magazines go about it as if its some secret of the universe that can only be uncovered by going through some kind of covert James Bond operations coupled with Indiana Jones' life-threatening adventures and then you have to translate the secret "men" scrolls by taking out your spleen and using its juice to reveal it.
Let the Chindian tell you how to get men interested...like Harrison Ford said in the movie "6 days 7 nights" (or something like that), "All you (the women) have to do...is show up!" Of course we appreciate the effort taken to get us in the mood but we don't take it as seriously as women do. If you cook our favourite dinner, put our favourite movie on or just sit with us to watch TV, we are turned on! No need to go out and specially buy some peek-a-boo lingerie (though I won't complain) or sprinkle rose petals on the floor and bed or have a fancy meal planned out.
Women think those are necessary because YOU want it! It doesn't always mean so do we. Here is my basic minimum to get ME excited. Have McDonald's or Sg Besi Wan Tan Mee or just porridge from Pudu doggie bagged home. Sit with me, have dinner in front of the TV for one show or a match. Drag me into the bedroom and do whatever you want. If time is of the essence, we can skip dinner and TV altogether and just jump straight into shower together.
If you ask the man in your life about it or let him read this, he will nod his head in agreement. Of course we WILL and DO appreciate if you put in all that extra effort and it will make you feel sexy as well but you don't need Cosmo or FHM or all these tabloids to make it look like some kind of PhD thesis that they thought up. It cracks me up everytime I see these articles.
It's ok to tell us what YOU want. We will try our level best to build the romance up for you and I know the Generation X and Y men will do so, unlike most of our parents. But ladies, for us, just keep it simple and get to do the horizontal dance of love whenever we want to. Read a lot about different positions and don't get TOO hygenic (if you know what I mean). That will get us in the mood.
Don't have to thank me. Just doing my job.
1) Why are men so (pick your choice) inept, inconsiderate, insensitive, unromantic, cannot committ, blah, blah, blah.
2) How to get men (pick your choice) in the mood, sexy, good in bed, interested, blah, blah, blah.
I can't really comment on part 1 since men are all that because women made the rules. Why are men to inept in bed? It's because women complain that we climax faster than them.
Is it our fault that happens? We can't help it that we get excited a lot earlier. Sometimes before the women are ready. Sometimes before she is even, technically in the room. But is it something we "chose" to do??? Of course not! It's just our biological make up. Eons ago when the mortality rate was super low due to disaeses, wild beast and a coffee outlet was just a dream, Neanderthals didn't have time to indulge in this huge thing with women called "foreplay". We had to procreate fast and move on. It was the survival of the species. But because of rules set by women, we are suddenly inept.
How come we men don't get to complain about women being SO sensitive, SO spoilt that we have open doors for them, SO picky, SO long to climax, uses SO much tissue, buys SO much of those animal shaped cute soaps that no one can use and only reserved for when the Pope visits???
Anyway, I digress.
I would like to comment on the second point. There are WAY too many covert secrets and methods to get men interested in a love life or a serious commitment or even sex. Especially sex. The way these magazines go about it as if its some secret of the universe that can only be uncovered by going through some kind of covert James Bond operations coupled with Indiana Jones' life-threatening adventures and then you have to translate the secret "men" scrolls by taking out your spleen and using its juice to reveal it.
Let the Chindian tell you how to get men interested...like Harrison Ford said in the movie "6 days 7 nights" (or something like that), "All you (the women) have to do...is show up!" Of course we appreciate the effort taken to get us in the mood but we don't take it as seriously as women do. If you cook our favourite dinner, put our favourite movie on or just sit with us to watch TV, we are turned on! No need to go out and specially buy some peek-a-boo lingerie (though I won't complain) or sprinkle rose petals on the floor and bed or have a fancy meal planned out.
Women think those are necessary because YOU want it! It doesn't always mean so do we. Here is my basic minimum to get ME excited. Have McDonald's or Sg Besi Wan Tan Mee or just porridge from Pudu doggie bagged home. Sit with me, have dinner in front of the TV for one show or a match. Drag me into the bedroom and do whatever you want. If time is of the essence, we can skip dinner and TV altogether and just jump straight into shower together.
If you ask the man in your life about it or let him read this, he will nod his head in agreement. Of course we WILL and DO appreciate if you put in all that extra effort and it will make you feel sexy as well but you don't need Cosmo or FHM or all these tabloids to make it look like some kind of PhD thesis that they thought up. It cracks me up everytime I see these articles.
It's ok to tell us what YOU want. We will try our level best to build the romance up for you and I know the Generation X and Y men will do so, unlike most of our parents. But ladies, for us, just keep it simple and get to do the horizontal dance of love whenever we want to. Read a lot about different positions and don't get TOO hygenic (if you know what I mean). That will get us in the mood.
Don't have to thank me. Just doing my job.
Kids need to bend the rules
The world is not perfect and sometimes we just got to chill out and hang loose. In other words, don't be such a stiffy! Take that stick out of your ass. Then again, no one is saying allow hell to break loose!!! Hey, ass-whooping is ass-whooping. Your kids step out of line, an ass-whooping needs to rain down. But there are times when we can break the rules with out kids. That way, they learn the reality of the world (that it isn't fair and Chindians look better) and will be ready for disappointments and be ready to kick some ass of their own.
I believe these tips will help them manage the shades of grey that exists in our lives and hopefully give them the street smarts to manage it.
1) Sneak snacks into a movie theater
There isn't one person reading this who hasn't sneaked Milk Duds or a box of Mike & Ike's into a movie theater. When a business is trying to take advantage of you to that degree, stuffing your pockets seems absolutely fair. Sneaking snacks into a theater is a great place to start when teaching your kids where they can bend certain rules in society. This also covers stadiums, concerts, or anywhere else that tries to fleece you for a stale, lukewarm pretzel and a $9 tub of popcorn.
2) Question teachers
I am by no means asking kids to become a disruption or a nightmare to their teachers. However, I don't see any harm in letting them question their teachers once in a while. One thing kids don't do enough in school is ask, "Why?" Mindlessly memorizing facts and goofy math patterns to pass some stupid govt-mandated test doesn't teach kids to think independently.
I have to believe that the many great teachers out there would welcome the curiosity and enthusiasm that would follow. I don't want my kids to know just the answers; I want them to know why a certain problem works the way it does.
3) Learn how to tell a white lie
Now, there's a big difference between having a kid who's a wolf-crying liar trusted by no one, and having a kid who knows when to lie to save someone's feelings. It could be telling Grandma that the "China-ching-chong" shirt she made for Chinese New Year is perfect. Or it might be letting your kid inform someone he or she doesn't want to date that "I don't have time to go out with anyone right now," instead of the real reason -- that the kid looks like a cross between Boy George and Whoopi Goldberg.
These are the exact kind of subtleties that kids need to know in life. Showing them how to throw out a little white lie instead of destroying someone's feelings just might save an important friendship, or keep a job, or maintain family peace.
4) Pee in the woods
More and more these days, kids seem to get sucked into their Xbox, iPod or cell phone without spending enough time outdoors and having fun the old-fashioned way. Take the kids up to the mountains or to a nature park and let them do the things that they're meant to do: raise hell, laugh and pee in the woods. Nothing says that you're at one with nature more than relieving yourself just like the pioneers did. And while you're at it, teach the kids how to build a great campfire. Notice I said you. I will be in the insect-free chalet enjoying the air-cond, running water and cable TV.
5) Bend the rules when playing sports
Teaching your kids good sportsmanship as they head into the wonderful world of athletics is immensely important. However, after you get past the age when every kid plays soccer and basketball only because their parents want them to, you get into a very competitive area. Select all-star teams for kids who haven't yet hit secondary school are now the norm.
Your kids will end up awfully naïve if you let them grow up thinking that athletes aren't bending the rules. And by the time they're teens, they're ready to learn there are a ton of tricks and ways to bend the rules in sports that don't include steroids, blood doping or stealing the other team's mascot. I'm talking about head games, flicking the elbow in hoops when someone's shooting, holding the other player's jersey, and more.
I believe these tips will help them manage the shades of grey that exists in our lives and hopefully give them the street smarts to manage it.
1) Sneak snacks into a movie theater
There isn't one person reading this who hasn't sneaked Milk Duds or a box of Mike & Ike's into a movie theater. When a business is trying to take advantage of you to that degree, stuffing your pockets seems absolutely fair. Sneaking snacks into a theater is a great place to start when teaching your kids where they can bend certain rules in society. This also covers stadiums, concerts, or anywhere else that tries to fleece you for a stale, lukewarm pretzel and a $9 tub of popcorn.
2) Question teachers
I am by no means asking kids to become a disruption or a nightmare to their teachers. However, I don't see any harm in letting them question their teachers once in a while. One thing kids don't do enough in school is ask, "Why?" Mindlessly memorizing facts and goofy math patterns to pass some stupid govt-mandated test doesn't teach kids to think independently.
I have to believe that the many great teachers out there would welcome the curiosity and enthusiasm that would follow. I don't want my kids to know just the answers; I want them to know why a certain problem works the way it does.
3) Learn how to tell a white lie
Now, there's a big difference between having a kid who's a wolf-crying liar trusted by no one, and having a kid who knows when to lie to save someone's feelings. It could be telling Grandma that the "China-ching-chong" shirt she made for Chinese New Year is perfect. Or it might be letting your kid inform someone he or she doesn't want to date that "I don't have time to go out with anyone right now," instead of the real reason -- that the kid looks like a cross between Boy George and Whoopi Goldberg.
These are the exact kind of subtleties that kids need to know in life. Showing them how to throw out a little white lie instead of destroying someone's feelings just might save an important friendship, or keep a job, or maintain family peace.
4) Pee in the woods
More and more these days, kids seem to get sucked into their Xbox, iPod or cell phone without spending enough time outdoors and having fun the old-fashioned way. Take the kids up to the mountains or to a nature park and let them do the things that they're meant to do: raise hell, laugh and pee in the woods. Nothing says that you're at one with nature more than relieving yourself just like the pioneers did. And while you're at it, teach the kids how to build a great campfire. Notice I said you. I will be in the insect-free chalet enjoying the air-cond, running water and cable TV.
5) Bend the rules when playing sports
Teaching your kids good sportsmanship as they head into the wonderful world of athletics is immensely important. However, after you get past the age when every kid plays soccer and basketball only because their parents want them to, you get into a very competitive area. Select all-star teams for kids who haven't yet hit secondary school are now the norm.
Your kids will end up awfully naïve if you let them grow up thinking that athletes aren't bending the rules. And by the time they're teens, they're ready to learn there are a ton of tricks and ways to bend the rules in sports that don't include steroids, blood doping or stealing the other team's mascot. I'm talking about head games, flicking the elbow in hoops when someone's shooting, holding the other player's jersey, and more.
7 tips to be better Dads
I have had experience with these tips and it has made me a better person and a better dad. My kids can attest to it. Now that my Mikey is going to be 12 this weekend, he is going to grow at lightspeed after this. Already showing signs of teenage angst, I can't treat him like my dad did to us when we were growing up. While I don't spoil Mikey, I also don't want to alienate him.
The best thing to remember is to continuously respect him and try to give him the assurance of a happy and stress free home. So I hope these tips work for you or at least you will enjoy reading them.
1. Dig deeper
A nice house, cool clothes, and food on the table just aren't enough. Providing for our kids is in our DNA, but how well do you know yours? Do you know who your kids play with at recess? What subject they really struggle with? What they love to eat for lunch? If you don't know these things, you need to. While all of us are busy as hell with work and everything else in our lives, we need to make time for our kids and get to really know them -- especially the odd, everyday things that make them tick. I make it a point to talk with my kids about what happened at recess before asking about what happened in class. I want to know about the relationships they're forging, and also what they're up to with their only free time of the day. It's not easy to get this from them. But here's a fun tip I picked up, to spend a little time with them that they'll think is awesome: When your kids are standing at the bus stop ready to be picked up for school, drive up, stop, and tell them to get in. Kidnap them for breakfast and they'll think it's the coolest thing ever. When kids are really impressed or excited by something (like this) there's a much better chance of them opening up and telling you about their lives. Don't preach, don't gasp, just listen.
2. Teach your kids to stand tall
One of the most important things a father needs to teach his kids is how to stand up for themselves. You will not get far in this world if you become a doormat, and the longer you let it happen, the harder it is to turn it around. This can be anything from just learning how to speak up in class, or confronting someone who's being unfair to them. Our offspring need to be heard, defend what they believe in, and not be bullied. Yes, we want them to be nice and to treat people well, but there is also a time to be assertive instead of like a punching bag. Teaching them how to do all this in a scary world is one of the basic duties of being a father.
3. Get off your rear
While we may be proud of our lecturing skills, most of the time when we talk all our kids hear is, "Blah, blah, blah." So that makes our actions even more important. You can tell the kids that it's important to be healthy and active, but if all they ever see you do is sit on the couch shoveling Doritos into your mouth as you watch "Celebrity Rehab," they're going to do the exact same thing. Kids should always be learning, exploring and trying new things. It's all part of how they find out what they're passionate about and who they are.
Dads can help fuel this exploration by doing the same thing; getting involved in new sports, musical instruments, and activities. This keeps dads fresh and active, and also shows kids that it's cool to try new things. Want to crank up the enthusiasm? Get junior's buddy and his dad in the game too -- kids will do almost anything if their friends are involved. If you want to start golfing, make it a foursome and it'll be even more fun.
4. Prepare for your death
This should be something that I shouldn't even have to write, but it's amazing how many men skip this to save a buck. We can all sit here and think that it's not going to happen to us, but death happens to dads every day. Protecting your family should be number-one on your responsibilities list as a father. If you're not taking care of your family you run the risk of ruining their lives if the worst should happen. This encompasses a lot, including having a life insurance policy and a will, and knowing who's going to be there to teach your son about being a man. Another aspect of this is keeping yourself healthy with regular physicals and, for God's sake, exercise. I used to work out to look better, but now it's all about longevity. My ultimate goal is to live long enough to make sure my daughter doesn't marry some jackass. They don't say "hope for the best and prepare for the worst" for nothing.
5. No worshipping heroes
There are parents out there who absolutely worship their kids and think they can do no wrong. But those kids will grow up with a distorted view of how the world works. Every parent should love the hell out of their children, but thinking that they are flawless is setting all of you up for disaster. The kids end up with unreal expectations on how the world works, don't understand defeat, and can't figure out why everyone doesn't think they walk on water. And the parents end up devastated when you finally come to the realization that little "angel" actually is capable of throwing his classmate into the girls' bathroom or stealing the neighbor's mail. We all have flaws, and there's nothing wrong with that. Let them learn to deal with the disappointment of losing, and even the brilliance of constructive criticism. It'll prepare them for the real world.
6. Remember why you married her
I've said this before, but a lot of people still scratch their head when I do. One of the best (if not the best) things you can do for your kids is to be a good husband to their mother. This can be difficult to do, but it just might be the most important item on the list. We pay so much attention to not screwing up our kids that we sometimes neglect the one relationship that plays the biggest role in the person they turn out to be. And if you're divorced, remember that the way you treat their mother will have an enormous impact. It will help them respect her, and also show them how to deal with challenging relationships as they get older.
7. Imitate Clark W. Griswold
Clark was on to something when he loaded up the family truckster and headed west to Wally World. A couple times a year, we all need to bust out of that rut that our daily routine puts us in -- and getting out of Dodge is the only cure. It's not just us either; every member of the family needs to get away and put a little adventure back in their life. As painful as the family vacation can be while it's happening (with the constant potty breaks, spilled juice boxes, and annoying comments from the backseat), I run into more adults who claim that vacations were the parts about their childhood that they'll never forget. It doesn't have to be expensive -- you don't have to go far -- you just need to have a family experience to remember, for better or worse.
The best thing to remember is to continuously respect him and try to give him the assurance of a happy and stress free home. So I hope these tips work for you or at least you will enjoy reading them.
1. Dig deeper
A nice house, cool clothes, and food on the table just aren't enough. Providing for our kids is in our DNA, but how well do you know yours? Do you know who your kids play with at recess? What subject they really struggle with? What they love to eat for lunch? If you don't know these things, you need to. While all of us are busy as hell with work and everything else in our lives, we need to make time for our kids and get to really know them -- especially the odd, everyday things that make them tick. I make it a point to talk with my kids about what happened at recess before asking about what happened in class. I want to know about the relationships they're forging, and also what they're up to with their only free time of the day. It's not easy to get this from them. But here's a fun tip I picked up, to spend a little time with them that they'll think is awesome: When your kids are standing at the bus stop ready to be picked up for school, drive up, stop, and tell them to get in. Kidnap them for breakfast and they'll think it's the coolest thing ever. When kids are really impressed or excited by something (like this) there's a much better chance of them opening up and telling you about their lives. Don't preach, don't gasp, just listen.
2. Teach your kids to stand tall
One of the most important things a father needs to teach his kids is how to stand up for themselves. You will not get far in this world if you become a doormat, and the longer you let it happen, the harder it is to turn it around. This can be anything from just learning how to speak up in class, or confronting someone who's being unfair to them. Our offspring need to be heard, defend what they believe in, and not be bullied. Yes, we want them to be nice and to treat people well, but there is also a time to be assertive instead of like a punching bag. Teaching them how to do all this in a scary world is one of the basic duties of being a father.
3. Get off your rear
While we may be proud of our lecturing skills, most of the time when we talk all our kids hear is, "Blah, blah, blah." So that makes our actions even more important. You can tell the kids that it's important to be healthy and active, but if all they ever see you do is sit on the couch shoveling Doritos into your mouth as you watch "Celebrity Rehab," they're going to do the exact same thing. Kids should always be learning, exploring and trying new things. It's all part of how they find out what they're passionate about and who they are.
Dads can help fuel this exploration by doing the same thing; getting involved in new sports, musical instruments, and activities. This keeps dads fresh and active, and also shows kids that it's cool to try new things. Want to crank up the enthusiasm? Get junior's buddy and his dad in the game too -- kids will do almost anything if their friends are involved. If you want to start golfing, make it a foursome and it'll be even more fun.
4. Prepare for your death
This should be something that I shouldn't even have to write, but it's amazing how many men skip this to save a buck. We can all sit here and think that it's not going to happen to us, but death happens to dads every day. Protecting your family should be number-one on your responsibilities list as a father. If you're not taking care of your family you run the risk of ruining their lives if the worst should happen. This encompasses a lot, including having a life insurance policy and a will, and knowing who's going to be there to teach your son about being a man. Another aspect of this is keeping yourself healthy with regular physicals and, for God's sake, exercise. I used to work out to look better, but now it's all about longevity. My ultimate goal is to live long enough to make sure my daughter doesn't marry some jackass. They don't say "hope for the best and prepare for the worst" for nothing.
5. No worshipping heroes
There are parents out there who absolutely worship their kids and think they can do no wrong. But those kids will grow up with a distorted view of how the world works. Every parent should love the hell out of their children, but thinking that they are flawless is setting all of you up for disaster. The kids end up with unreal expectations on how the world works, don't understand defeat, and can't figure out why everyone doesn't think they walk on water. And the parents end up devastated when you finally come to the realization that little "angel" actually is capable of throwing his classmate into the girls' bathroom or stealing the neighbor's mail. We all have flaws, and there's nothing wrong with that. Let them learn to deal with the disappointment of losing, and even the brilliance of constructive criticism. It'll prepare them for the real world.
6. Remember why you married her
I've said this before, but a lot of people still scratch their head when I do. One of the best (if not the best) things you can do for your kids is to be a good husband to their mother. This can be difficult to do, but it just might be the most important item on the list. We pay so much attention to not screwing up our kids that we sometimes neglect the one relationship that plays the biggest role in the person they turn out to be. And if you're divorced, remember that the way you treat their mother will have an enormous impact. It will help them respect her, and also show them how to deal with challenging relationships as they get older.
7. Imitate Clark W. Griswold
Clark was on to something when he loaded up the family truckster and headed west to Wally World. A couple times a year, we all need to bust out of that rut that our daily routine puts us in -- and getting out of Dodge is the only cure. It's not just us either; every member of the family needs to get away and put a little adventure back in their life. As painful as the family vacation can be while it's happening (with the constant potty breaks, spilled juice boxes, and annoying comments from the backseat), I run into more adults who claim that vacations were the parts about their childhood that they'll never forget. It doesn't have to be expensive -- you don't have to go far -- you just need to have a family experience to remember, for better or worse.
The 10 "Dad" Commandments
Chindians take fatherhood very seriously especially me. We take it more seriously as we don't want our kids to be too confused and lose their sense of individuality, especially in a country like Malaysia. Here you have nationalist who don't want schools to teach subjects in English as that will make them lose their language identity (like there are so many people speaking Malay in the world), we have Malays who call other races immigrants even though we have been here longer than them, we have us giving citizenships to illegal immigrants from Indonesia who commit crime, we have corrupt murderers as Prime Ministers-in-waiting and a member of the 7 dwarf as our current PM (Sleepy).
So I want to make sure that my kids know that they are special and that they can do more good than harm. In my desire to be a better dad, I came across these 2 articles, which I will split into different postings. Do enjoy the 10 Commandments for Dads.
1. Hey, Dad, be big
In spirit, that is. Consider some of the big guys who have gone before you: Father Time, God the Father. You can't give this role a walk-through. You've got to play it. The kids expect stature from you. You're the anvil on which they hammer out their deal with the world. Be a presence in their lives-and in their minds.
2. Hey, Dad, be small
Yes, this contradicts the first tip. Don't be so big that you suck all the air out of the room. Give your kids space to move around in, to test their thoughts and strengths. Take a backseat three or four times a week. Say, "Maybe." Say, "I don't know." Now and then, tell the kids you're sorry-assuming you behaved badly. You'll feel brand new.
3. Hey, Dad, come home
Lots of fathers have two jobs. If that's your situation, God bless you, pal. You'll get no heat from me. But if you can pay the bills without working double shifts, get home when you can. Nothing good can happen until you do.
4. Bob and weave, Bubba
Stay light on your feet. Don't make too many hard-and-fast rules. Don't insist on having your way with the kids just because the rest of the world isn't always overly interested in the sound of your voice. There is a difference between authority and power. Have the first; don't abuse the second.
5. Never dance in front of their friends
Remember the cautionary legend of the father who once picked his kids up at a junior-high dance and actually went into the gym and did a few seconds of the Hully Gully with another parent. His adult children still have embarrassment nightmares.
6. Save your money, big man
If you're not careful, the kids will send you to the poorhouse three dollars and twenty-nine cents at a time. Think college tuition. Think down payment on their starter homes. Although it's true that money can't buy happiness, it can buy lots of other stuff.
7. Spend your money, tightwad
F. Scott Fitzgerald said the sign of a first-rate mind was the ability to have two opposite opinions at the same time. You're a first-rate mind, Dad. So spring for the glowing monster trading cards. If you've got the money, pop for the musical princess crown. What are you saving your money for, pal? College? Hah! You can't possibly save enough. There is the future, and then there is now. This is it.
8. Never go on a ride with the word whirl in its name.
Especially the Space Shuttle Whirl at the Great Escape near Lake George, New York. It's tougher to be a good father when your nervous system is permanently compromised. Stay on the ground and wave.
9. Let 'em be-they're not your second chance
We become most upset with the kids when they remind us of... well, us. Help them follow their own path, not your road not taken.
10. Love their mother
Hug Mom. Often. In front of the kids. Sure, sometimes marriages end, but the obligation to a woman doesn't. Be grateful to her. Speak to her with respect. Try to make her laugh. Listen. Even if you're not married to her, figure out how to love her.
So I want to make sure that my kids know that they are special and that they can do more good than harm. In my desire to be a better dad, I came across these 2 articles, which I will split into different postings. Do enjoy the 10 Commandments for Dads.
1. Hey, Dad, be big
In spirit, that is. Consider some of the big guys who have gone before you: Father Time, God the Father. You can't give this role a walk-through. You've got to play it. The kids expect stature from you. You're the anvil on which they hammer out their deal with the world. Be a presence in their lives-and in their minds.
2. Hey, Dad, be small
Yes, this contradicts the first tip. Don't be so big that you suck all the air out of the room. Give your kids space to move around in, to test their thoughts and strengths. Take a backseat three or four times a week. Say, "Maybe." Say, "I don't know." Now and then, tell the kids you're sorry-assuming you behaved badly. You'll feel brand new.
3. Hey, Dad, come home
Lots of fathers have two jobs. If that's your situation, God bless you, pal. You'll get no heat from me. But if you can pay the bills without working double shifts, get home when you can. Nothing good can happen until you do.
4. Bob and weave, Bubba
Stay light on your feet. Don't make too many hard-and-fast rules. Don't insist on having your way with the kids just because the rest of the world isn't always overly interested in the sound of your voice. There is a difference between authority and power. Have the first; don't abuse the second.
5. Never dance in front of their friends
Remember the cautionary legend of the father who once picked his kids up at a junior-high dance and actually went into the gym and did a few seconds of the Hully Gully with another parent. His adult children still have embarrassment nightmares.
6. Save your money, big man
If you're not careful, the kids will send you to the poorhouse three dollars and twenty-nine cents at a time. Think college tuition. Think down payment on their starter homes. Although it's true that money can't buy happiness, it can buy lots of other stuff.
7. Spend your money, tightwad
F. Scott Fitzgerald said the sign of a first-rate mind was the ability to have two opposite opinions at the same time. You're a first-rate mind, Dad. So spring for the glowing monster trading cards. If you've got the money, pop for the musical princess crown. What are you saving your money for, pal? College? Hah! You can't possibly save enough. There is the future, and then there is now. This is it.
8. Never go on a ride with the word whirl in its name.
Especially the Space Shuttle Whirl at the Great Escape near Lake George, New York. It's tougher to be a good father when your nervous system is permanently compromised. Stay on the ground and wave.
9. Let 'em be-they're not your second chance
We become most upset with the kids when they remind us of... well, us. Help them follow their own path, not your road not taken.
10. Love their mother
Hug Mom. Often. In front of the kids. Sure, sometimes marriages end, but the obligation to a woman doesn't. Be grateful to her. Speak to her with respect. Try to make her laugh. Listen. Even if you're not married to her, figure out how to love her.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Time Tunnel : A walk thru Malaysian past
I wanted to do this since last month but I am not known for my time management. The hospital I was born in, is still waiting for my blood sample and records. Being part of the Malaysian civil service, they seem to think I already submitted, so all's well. Anyway, I wanted to have a separate article just on this place that we went to in Cameron Highlands last year. It was a museum of things that you could find in the 60s, 70s and 80s. Meaning it contained things that I grew up with. It was very nostalgic for me and I hope it will give you the same nostalgia while giving our foreign friends a glimpse of Malaysian life, when things were so much more simpler.
The pic below is called "Tikam" which means "poke" or in this case "trying your luck". You buy a stuck piece of paper (stuck to that cardboard rectangle) for 5-10 cents and unfold it to show a number corresponding to a price on another cardboard. It was gambling for the young un.
Below is a poorly taken picture of a rusty iron pump. It is primarily used to pump kerosene into a bottle to be used in our stove or lamps. We used kerosene a lot and it was a chore my brother and I hated! Not only was it dangerous (like I said, times were simpler then, so who knew these were fire hazards), it STUNK!!
This was about the only bicycle you could get back in the 70s. This was before the emergence of the BMX, Chopper, etc. I think the most popular brand was 7-up Sport (can't remember why though) but we called it the Bengali's bike because we see a lot of the Bengali's riding it.
Here is a little treasure trove but check out the lamp used by miners on the top right which was used in a lot of households. Also the calendar which was hugely popular, where you tear out each day. Not very eco-friendly those days. The "A Go-Go" record on the top left also cracked me up!!
This is a cool drawer, filled with items that I could remember. My favourite of course, was the Nintendo "Game & Watch". This particular one is "Octopus". See how many you could remember.
We didn't have many electronics stuff back then and behind Melissa, is the weighing contraption that was used to weigh groceries. You put the groceries on the flatbed and the put weights on the dangling doohicky until it is balanced. Then you see how much it weighs by the amount of weights you have added.
Aaahhh....this is a magic contraption. You depress the long tail and death comes out of its nozzle. Below the nozzle is a round container which is where you put in the "death" solution. If you haven't guessed, its an insect spray.
Old light switches.
How many bottled drinks can you remember and also the coffee shops used to have these table settings. Far cry from Starbucks eh?
These were our comics. The Chinese flying heroes always had a dot on their forehead. Must have been Chindians!!
Mikey trying the old "aneh" barber chair and a dentist chair. Can't tell which is which so go figure.
Some cash denominations.
The evolution of the telephone. You should see the kids' faces when they saw our old black, heavy dial phones! ("How many ring tones does it have?", "Where's the camera?", "How the heck do you fit in into your pockets???").
You have got to have one of these at home. Everyone did!! Remember the jingle? "Singer! Menawan keluarga bahagia". "Singer, makes your home a happy home" or something to that effect.
This is our food cupboard or "meat-safe" or something like that. On top of it, is a contraption we used to shave coconut so that we get that scraps to make coconut milk or "santan".
This is the ever popular butterfly kerosene stove, also known as a extra large molotov cocktail!! The kerosene goes into that transparent thingy which flows into the wick in the middle of the stove, which was hugely popular. We used this during the Japanese occupation and in our war against the communist, where you can fling it into the middle of the army!! Ha!Ha! It's a bloody wonder, my brother and I didn't burn the house down, or our parents would have killed us.
Every house had a Fab washing powder and if you lived in a village like I did for a while, you will have that huge ceramic tub. It used to be as tall as I was.
That's Malaysia's most successful performer, P. Ramlee. Sadly, since his death in the 70s, no one has been able to take over.'
Every ladies' fav past time. "Setting" their hair at the hair salon. I used to follow my mom to these places and had a ball since they had comics and normally a junk food stall. Mikey says it's some alien brain washing thingamagic! And in some ways, he's right.
This is a usual scene of a grocery store. Check out that HUGE Ajinomoto container! Can you imagine the health inspector having a heart attack seeing such a huge blatant show of MSG-ness!
Common electrical appliances. The fan will cut off your fingers and the TV comes with a radio at the base. Sorry, no remote!
Cinema movie flyers.
Mortar used in the kitchen to grind chili, pound garlic, onion, etc. I used this a lot! Back in the days, men were a lot more faithful. These things will crack your head wide open!
Toys for the kids. Remember these? Though the car will be for the more affluent.
And as the pictures says it, this was a "Speshul" posting. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Make a trip if you can and re-live our childhood.
The pic below is called "Tikam" which means "poke" or in this case "trying your luck". You buy a stuck piece of paper (stuck to that cardboard rectangle) for 5-10 cents and unfold it to show a number corresponding to a price on another cardboard. It was gambling for the young un.
Below is a poorly taken picture of a rusty iron pump. It is primarily used to pump kerosene into a bottle to be used in our stove or lamps. We used kerosene a lot and it was a chore my brother and I hated! Not only was it dangerous (like I said, times were simpler then, so who knew these were fire hazards), it STUNK!!
This was about the only bicycle you could get back in the 70s. This was before the emergence of the BMX, Chopper, etc. I think the most popular brand was 7-up Sport (can't remember why though) but we called it the Bengali's bike because we see a lot of the Bengali's riding it.
Here is a little treasure trove but check out the lamp used by miners on the top right which was used in a lot of households. Also the calendar which was hugely popular, where you tear out each day. Not very eco-friendly those days. The "A Go-Go" record on the top left also cracked me up!!
This is a cool drawer, filled with items that I could remember. My favourite of course, was the Nintendo "Game & Watch". This particular one is "Octopus". See how many you could remember.
We didn't have many electronics stuff back then and behind Melissa, is the weighing contraption that was used to weigh groceries. You put the groceries on the flatbed and the put weights on the dangling doohicky until it is balanced. Then you see how much it weighs by the amount of weights you have added.
Aaahhh....this is a magic contraption. You depress the long tail and death comes out of its nozzle. Below the nozzle is a round container which is where you put in the "death" solution. If you haven't guessed, its an insect spray.
Old light switches.
How many bottled drinks can you remember and also the coffee shops used to have these table settings. Far cry from Starbucks eh?
These were our comics. The Chinese flying heroes always had a dot on their forehead. Must have been Chindians!!
Mikey trying the old "aneh" barber chair and a dentist chair. Can't tell which is which so go figure.
Some cash denominations.
The evolution of the telephone. You should see the kids' faces when they saw our old black, heavy dial phones! ("How many ring tones does it have?", "Where's the camera?", "How the heck do you fit in into your pockets???").
You have got to have one of these at home. Everyone did!! Remember the jingle? "Singer! Menawan keluarga bahagia". "Singer, makes your home a happy home" or something to that effect.
This is our food cupboard or "meat-safe" or something like that. On top of it, is a contraption we used to shave coconut so that we get that scraps to make coconut milk or "santan".
This is the ever popular butterfly kerosene stove, also known as a extra large molotov cocktail!! The kerosene goes into that transparent thingy which flows into the wick in the middle of the stove, which was hugely popular. We used this during the Japanese occupation and in our war against the communist, where you can fling it into the middle of the army!! Ha!Ha! It's a bloody wonder, my brother and I didn't burn the house down, or our parents would have killed us.
Every house had a Fab washing powder and if you lived in a village like I did for a while, you will have that huge ceramic tub. It used to be as tall as I was.
That's Malaysia's most successful performer, P. Ramlee. Sadly, since his death in the 70s, no one has been able to take over.'
Every ladies' fav past time. "Setting" their hair at the hair salon. I used to follow my mom to these places and had a ball since they had comics and normally a junk food stall. Mikey says it's some alien brain washing thingamagic! And in some ways, he's right.
This is a usual scene of a grocery store. Check out that HUGE Ajinomoto container! Can you imagine the health inspector having a heart attack seeing such a huge blatant show of MSG-ness!
Common electrical appliances. The fan will cut off your fingers and the TV comes with a radio at the base. Sorry, no remote!
Cinema movie flyers.
Mortar used in the kitchen to grind chili, pound garlic, onion, etc. I used this a lot! Back in the days, men were a lot more faithful. These things will crack your head wide open!
Toys for the kids. Remember these? Though the car will be for the more affluent.
And as the pictures says it, this was a "Speshul" posting. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Make a trip if you can and re-live our childhood.
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